And yes, we’re
talking craps. Or, rather, the lingo of craps.
As with all great languages, craps has its own dictionary
(you know a language has made it when it has a whole
book devoted to it!), a slim volume titled A Guide
to Craps Lingo: From Snake Eyes to Muleteeth. What
Webster did for the English language, Chris Fagans
and David Guzman have done for craps.
Once you have read
this book, you will be truly bilingual. You’ll
be able to speak your inferior language and the
superior language of craps.
Let us give you some linguistic enlightenment:
Of course, everyone
knows what “snakes eyes” means (your daughter’s
boyfriend), and everyone has heard of “yo”
as in Rocky’s classic comment after he suffered
serious brain damage: “Yo, Adrian, I did it!”
Poor Rocky, when asked what he had actually done,
he couldn’t quit remember. So he said: “yo-eleven”
which he thought was the round he had been knocked
out in. And that’s how “yo-eleven”
became a craps call. In honor of really stupid New
Yorkers, the “eleven” is sometimes referred
to as a Star Wars character, “Yo-Duh.”
And did you know that
“Little Joe” is not just a character on
the old Bonanza series but another way to say “four.”
You could also say “Tutu.” No, not in
honor of the South African bishop or to describe
what a ballet dancer wears, but again as another
way to say “four.”
Remember that old Rosemary
Clooney song, “You Give Me Fever”? Well,
Frank was five when he first heard it and guess
what -- that’s what fever means in craps --
a “five.” So when you put your bet down
for a “five,” just say: “I got a
fever for you.” Of course, if the dealer doesn’t
know what that means, he might think you’re
coming on to him or he might get upset because he
thinks you have some rare tropical disease or both.
Here’s a colorfully disgusting call from a
stickman when the “five” rolls: “Five!
It’snot in the field, clean it up!”
The number “six”
doesn’t have many really good synonyms but
“the lumber number” certainly conjures
images in the imagination best left unwritten in
a family paper.
The “seven”
is the most dreaded number in craps after the shooter
has established which point he’s shooting for.
It is called the “Devil” and “Big
Red.” When a shooter rolls the “seven”
it can take a player to hell (“do” bettors)
or to heaven (“don’t” bettors). And
all craps players know, or should know, that if
you say the word “seven” out loud at the
table, bad luck will happen -- usually in the form
of a big, superstitious guy with a wicked left hook
heading for the mouth that is just finishing up
saying “seveeeeee” -- thump!
The “eight”
has several colorful appellations. Try these the
next time you place the “eight.” “Give
me a square pair!” “I want two windows.”
“Make that block fours.” When the shooter’s
number is “eight” and he makes it, dealers
can say: “He eight it!” Or, to be more
genteel, a dealer might say: “Meet Ada from
Decatur.”
Speaking of women,
when the “nine” is your point and you
make it, the dealer can shout: “Nina from Pasadena!”
as Nina, plain and without the attendant city, also
means “nine.” For some reason a “nine”
can be referred to as a “Jesse James,”
perhaps because he was shot with a 4-5 (which equals
nine). And for scurrilous stickmen, the call of
“nine” goes: “9-9-9 just like mine!”
(Deluded braggart!)
Evidently the British
have gotten involved when it comes to the “ten,”
which is labelled variously “Big Ben,”
“The Ripper,” “The Queen’s Crown”
and something too gross to mention in mixed company
or even alone. It is also called “Sunflowers,”
“Double Nickels,” “Venus and Mars”
and a “Tennessee Tottie.”
Finally, you have the famous “Box Cars”
or “twelve,” which can also be called:
“Midnight,” “The Apostles,”
“Six-Packs,” and “Muleteeth.”
Most cultures have
a religious component and some scholars would say
that religion and culture go together like a horse
and carriage (or was that love and marriage?). Anyway,
you will find many religious and moral sayings in
the culture of craps, as in this plea to the craps
deities: “Come on, baby needs a new pair of
shoes!” Of course, baby needs a new pair of
shoes because pop is busy playing craps with the
shoe money!
Peace on earth, good
will to men? The craps equivalent is much easier
to understand: “Dice -- be nice!” And
here’s the most dreaded of all craps calls:
“The devil jumped up!” That means the
nasty “seven” just ended a shooters roll.
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