goes up 10¢. Machines that are tied together,
like a bank (carousel) or networked slots like Megabucks or Quartermania, involve
a much lower progressive rate. In return, you are provided a mega jackpot—a.k.a.
big, big bucks.
On your typical video poker machine, the meters rise on the
average of between .25 and two percent with one percent being the industry average.
Dear Mark,
If I were to hit $1
million on a progressive quarter slot machine, will they pay me all at once? Dave
G.
Forget borrowing Uncle Fred’s
three-quarter-ton pickup truck to haul off 42,000 pounds of quarters. Look at
the machine closely, Dave. A sign placed inconspicuously on the machine will read
something like “Progressive Jackpot paid in 25 equal installments. First
installment paid upon validation of win.”
One exception is a statewide
progressive machine in Nevada, and other locations, called “Cool Millions.”
Bet 3 bucks, line up 3 ducks, and you win “the first million” instantly.
Now if you get your ducks in line, Dave, make them pay you in $100 bills. They
will weigh only twenty and a half pounds.
Dear Mark,
Don’t you think that when you write about long-shot slot
machines like Megabucks, you induce play rather than helping a player refrain
from playing? Stanley F.
The goal of this column is not to shill
for the casinos but to inform players on the exact cost of an evening’s entertainment.
I am of the opinion, Stanley, that players should know exactly what their chances
are of hitting the big jackpots. Some casinos do post the paybacks on their machines,
but not the true odds of hitting a jackpot. If they posted the odds, no one in
his right mind would play those machines. You will note, that I continually write
that your chances are slim to none for a life of opulence when playing Megabucks.
Unfortunately, no amount of education from me, nor the casino disclosing
the enormous odds right on a machine, will curb a player’s appetite for hitting
it rich. Every slot participant believes he or she will be the exception to the
rule; she will beat the celestial gods; it is he who will come home a victorious
contestant against ABC casino.
And every so often, Stanley, to induce a Pavlov
saliva reaction, you will read in the paper that Mabel, from Ames, Iowa, hit it
big, real big.
Good
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